What Do I Love More Than Jesus? Matthew 10:34–39

What Do I Love More Than Jesus?

Matthew 10:34–39

Some of Jesus’ words can be difficult to hear at first.

“Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword.”

How can the One who brings peace speak about a sword?

The verses that follow explain what Jesus means. He speaks of division between father and son, mother and daughter, and even within one’s own household.

The sword is not a command to use physical violence. It is a powerful picture of the division that can result when people respond differently to Christ.

The gospel is a message of peace. Through Christ, sinners are reconciled to God. Yet not everyone welcomes Christ. Because of this, the gospel can bring wonderful reconciliation, but faithfulness to Christ can also bring painful division.

The issue is not conflict itself.

We should never call every disagreement “persecution.” If our harshness, pride, or foolishness causes conflict, we cannot simply claim that we are suffering for Jesus. Christ has already called His disciples to be wise as serpents and innocent as doves.

Yet there are times when following Christ faithfully has a real relational cost.

Jesus therefore goes deeper:

“Anyone who loves their father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves their son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.”

Jesus does not tell us not to love our families.

The crucial words are:

“more than me.”

We should love our parents.
We should love our children.
We should treasure our families.

But no one can take the place that belongs to Christ.

In fact, loving Christ above all can teach us to love our families more rightly. We no longer need to make our parents idols or treat our children as possessions. We can love them as people entrusted to us by God.

Then Jesus goes even further:

“Whoever does not take up their cross and follow me is not worthy of me.”

We sometimes use the word “cross” for almost any difficulty in life. But for Jesus’ first hearers, a cross was not a sentimental religious symbol. It was an instrument of shame, suffering, and death.

Taking up the cross, therefore, means more than patiently enduring an inconvenience.

It means being willing to accept the cost that comes with following Christ.

Yet suffering itself is not the center of discipleship.

Jesus did not say, “Take up your cross and go alone.”

He said, in effect,

“Take up your cross and follow me.”

The center of discipleship is not suffering.

The center is Christ.

Finally, Jesus reaches the deepest level:

“Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it.”

We naturally try to protect our lives.

We protect our safety, relationships, reputation, plans, and future.

But if we preserve all of these by abandoning Christ, we may appear to have saved our lives while losing what truly matters.

Jesus gives us the opposite promise:

Whoever loses their life for His sake will find it.

The words “for my sake” matter.

Suffering does not save us.
Sacrifice does not save us.
Death does not save us.

Christ saves us.

And this is where the gospel becomes essential.

Jesus does not ask His disciples to walk a road He refuses to walk Himself.

The One who tells His disciples to take up the cross will Himself go to the cross.

The One who speaks about losing one’s life will give His own life for sinners.

The order of the gospel matters.

Christ does not love me because I first sacrificed enough for Him.

Christ loved first. He gave Himself for us, and those who have received His grace are now called to follow Him.

Matthew 10:34–39 therefore leaves us with a searching question:

What do I love more than Jesus?

The approval of others?
The approval of family?
Safety?
Comfort?
Even my own life?

Jesus calls us to love Him above all these things.

And we can follow Him because He first gave Himself for us.

Following Christ may sometimes look like losing.

But losing something for Christ is not the final loss.

Jesus promises:

“Whoever loses their life for my sake will find it.”

In the end, the most important question in discipleship is not what I may lose.

It is whom I am following.